Free this week is Jary’s Got a Gun, a 3,500-word comedy about a man who finds “the last gun on earth.” Read it now! You can also buy it for 99¢ in the Store.
Synopsis On the morning Jary Tomlin finds the world’s last remaining gun, he and his wife are having an argument in the kitchen. They’re being evicted, and Jary can’t imagine how life could possibly get much worse. Then he accidentally knocks a hole in the wall of the garage, and “worse” is exactly what he finds hidden inside.
The highlighted Store release for this week is Two Minutes to Midnight, an 1,800-word sci-fi drama. Read it now for only $0.99!
Synopsis The expansion wars have changed things. Gell Miller sees it everywhere he looks. As a bartender, he always tries to avoid stepping on the toes of any hostile alien visitors. But not all of his customers are so careful…
This weekend Larissa and I spent some time at her family’s newly renovated cabin (or I guess we’re supposed to call it the “lake house” now) at Hatzic Lake, visiting with family and friends. While we were there, I decided to take the opportunity to explore a couple of potential ring powers that were suggested to me by Twitter followers.
My friend Andrew, who is himself a married man, recommended that I check whether my wedding ring has granted me any powers of animal empathy. This seemed like a real possibility, since my latest discovery had suggested some potential psychic abilities. In addition, @mikerpenny figured I might as well test for vegetable empathy at the same time. It never hurts to be thorough.
There's an aloof bald eagle in the middle of the picture. Honestly.
On Sunday morning, I went kayaking out on the lake with my brother-in-law, Darren. A bald eagle was circling high overhead. I took the opportunity to focus all of my mental energy on it, willing the bird to open itself up to me. I suggested that it fly down and hang out for a bit, so we could get to know each other better. I don’t think I got through to it, though: it just looped around for a bit, then flew away. So much for animal empathy. Further evidence: none of my psychic pleading seemed to sway the mosquitoes in the slightest. ITCHY ITCHY.
I chose to interpret “vegetable empathy” as referring to a connection with plant life in general, not just with carrots, beans, and broccoli. I found the opportunity to explore this line of abilities on Sunday afternoon, while playing with my niece, Adalia. We were chasing each other across the lawn, and I was using the time in-between the frequent chaser/chasee role reversals to cast my mind out amongst the vegetation, searching for an empathic connection.
Such a sad, brave tree, toppled over but still doing the best it can to grow.
I wasn’t really paying attention to where we were going, and when I brought my attention back to what was in front of me, I saw a big fallen tree, partially uprooted but still fighting and growing. I figured if I couldn’t pick up some emotion from that barely living heap of inspirational tragedy, I wasn’t going to be able to connect to anything ever.
I squinted and grimaced and subvocalized and rubbed my temples and got nothing at all.
Apparently I’m just not all that empathic, not psychically so, anyways. Scratch a couple more options off the list.
Despite my failures, later that evening I did end up learning something very interesting. Some of our married friends were visiting, and one of the ladies–Larissa’s friend Megan–revealed that over the last few years, she had been having a hard time seeing certain things. Specifically, her mind seemed to be filtering out anything ugly.
I’ve been wondering why I hadn’t heard anything about the effects of wedding rings on married women. I mean, men have a League and everything. Now I’m thinking it might be because while men get special powers and abilities, women’s wedding rings may take away some of their prior capabilities. Other than the ability to see ugly things, how else might wedding rings affect the women who wear them? Physical weakness? Forgetfulness? This opens up a whole new line of enquiry!
As always, I’ll let you know what else I’m able to discover as my explorations continue.
Tomorrow Larissa and I will have been married for one month. It’s flown by, and been full of so much, so I wanted to just briefly reflect on things.
There are a couple of things that stand out from the wedding and the settling-in period afterwards. It’s been amazing how incredibly generous everyone has been to us. Our living room has been piled full of presents twice–once with gifts received prior to the wedding, and once with gifts we picked up after the honeymoon. It’s been really exciting opening everything up and seeing all of the new things that we can call “ours” now. It really makes home feel more like our home. Our recycling pile outside the front door is massive, though!
During the wedding itself, too, we had so many helping hands making everything go smoothly, and that was really appreciated. We had a really great day and were able to relax and just enjoy it all. Thank you to everyone who helped in some capacity.
One complaint I have so far is that my ring still hasn’t manifested any magical powers. I mean, I wasn’t counting on invisibility or anything, but a bit of added speed or agility would have been nice. Maybe some mind control. Breathing underwater?
Perhaps it’s still lying dormant. Has anyone had to wait until their first anniversary to unlock their powers? I can be patient if I have to, I guess.
