Flash Fiction: “Representative”

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If you really don’t want to head over there and check out the stories I’ve written, or all of the other great writing, here’s the latest bit of flash I did, in response to the prompt “representative.”


Representative

“I am a representative of the Poppledop Gang,” the pudgy blond boy told me, “and this is a list of our demands.” He was standing at my door wearing an ill-fitting little suit and waving a clipboard under my nose like it was a weapon. I had no idea who he was or what he wanted, but it was kind of cute.

“Demands?” I asked him. “But you haven’t given me any reason to listen to them yet!”

“Oh,” said the boy, apparently caught off guard. “Sorry, I should have said that first.” He looked down at his clipboard. “Ok, we, the Poppledop Gang, have taken your cat, and also your dog, and if you do not submit to our demands, we will put them both in a cage and you will never see them again!”

“Oh dear!” I said, very sweetly. “My cat and my dog are best friends! How could their good relationship possibly last if they are forced to spend time together?”

“And there will also be a badger in the cage,” he told me.

That was an unexpected wrinkle. “Where did you get a badger?” I asked.

“Don’t believe me?” he threatened. “Here are our demands. 1) Free ice cream for all gang members, in perpetuity. 2) Private use of your backyard for Poppledop Gang business, no questions asked. 3) We get to rename your pets whatever we want.”

“Uh huh,” I said sarcastically. “Yeah, sure, I’ll agree to that.”

“Oh good!” said the boy. “Can I have some ice cream?”

“No.” I closed the door and went to look for my pets. I couldn’t find them.

An hour later there was a knock at my door. I still have no idea where they found that badger.

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